My Mummy is so nice, she recently came near to me and gave me money to buy clothes. She said I didn’t buy any clothes for Chinese New Year yet. I told her to keep the money as she’s already elderly and it’s better for her to keep the money for her own spending or for any emergencies. I used to be the one buying clothes for my parents before CNY when I was still working but I have stopped that since I began my business. I should be the one giving them some money to buy clothes or buying for them, not the one taking, isn’t it. People won’t understand how hard it is not being able to give and do our responsibility. I’m Asian and as Asians, it’s ingrown into our thinking that we take it as our responsibility to provide when we’re grown up. Aside from business, I’ve this chronic illness which hinders my earning capacity. This illness is not something that I chose and I don’t want it. You think I want this illness – no I don’t. I would rather choose to be rich. I even stopped shopping unnecessarily for myself
It wasn’t easy but it needed to be done. All the while when I was working, I actually had my finances controlled pretty well but I could afford the luxury of buying as I like. Not that I cannot afford this luxury, I choose not to shop as much and only for my essentials. There was one point I was saving so much and tried living very simply on lower budget but it was to my detriment. I was putting myself in the wrong, dirty environment and mixing with the wrong people. Constant exposure to dust, dirt and noise with poor eating habits is just not my style.
My health deteriorated and that was how my skin allergies came about to be in such a terrible state. It’s just not my style and not the way I was brought up. I can adapt to changes but I know for sure from this experience that I cannot deny myself what I deserve. I have always been one to love to save my money and I must give myself some pampering. I now spend on better health products like vitamins, supplements and natural products. I eat healthy with my Mummy’s cooking. She uses less oil, less salt and less to no sugar for her cooking. There’s always fruits, vegetables wth rice and meat for daily consumption. That was how I was brought up. Soup is not daily nowadays but when I grew up, there was soup boiled everyday for us to drink. Our Cantonese soup is the super healthy kind like herbal soup, vegetable soup, soup to cool your body down and tonic soup.
Money is important to me but I would like my Mummy to keep the money for herself to spend for CNY. I would rather earn it through business or through some sort of trading. Business is actually a form of trading – one person is giving money in return for a service/item. Of course there are special occasions where you receive money without having to do much, let’s say ang pau (red packet) for Chinese New Year. If you look at this in another perspective, you could have been giving your wish/time/joy/love to the person giving the ang pau and in return, you receive the ang pau.
My health is much better now. Skin has healed so much. I just need to find a balance to not just save, I also need to pamper myself and not just my business. I also want to learn more about how to make my money grow and using money to make more money. It’s a never ending process of learning and the more I know, the more I know I don’t know.